Remembering J

It's funny how short life is, but when you are young healthy you don't think about it at all.  You think nothing of planning for the future, saying I'll do it tomorrow when you are not even guaranteed the end of today. This past week I witnessed someone dying right in front of me and
it's a feeling I can't shake nor will I ever forget.

It was a typical Sunday like many others, got dressed and headed out to church.  The familiar faces were there, I was sort of in a cranky mood and just sat off to the side.

Praise and worship was good like always lifting spirits, people were singing, dancing and worshipping.  Every week during meet and greet I would always say Hi to this little old lady,
this week I was so cranky I excused myself to the washroom when it took place.  Anyways this little old lady (lol) started attending the church I go to about 4 months ago.

It was shocking to me because she was a Jewish Christian one of the few I have come across. Never once did this lady get angry, upset, she was always happy, always smiling
with a big heart for others. My nieces loved her and she would always hug them, run after them and was diligent in all matters.

After praise and worship, the few people that attended that Sunday went back to their seats. Tithes and offering were taken up, and after that the message of the day was started to be spoken.
Sadly I was on my phone texting away, not really paying attention.  I took a seat somewhat in the back from everyone, still cranky and couldn't wait till church was over. Suddenly I heard a scream and "Open your eyes".

I looked up and everyone was rushing to the front.  My heart was beating fast as a good portion of my family attends this church, and I was scared something happened to them.

 As I reached the front I saw J slumped to the side, skin turning blue. Everyone around me seemed to be calling 911, I was in a daze shocked.  It took the ambulance like 7 minutes to arrive but it felt like hours, as I just stood there
watching CPR performed on J.

They took her away to the hospital, and we all waited hoping for some good news.  A few members of the church followed the ambulance to the hospital and a hour later they returned letting us know that J has passed away.

Sadness overcame me right away, tears were flowing down the faces of everyone. I hate hugging, but at that moment I hugged everyone I came across. I never cry but tears were flowing down my face at that moment.

To literally see someone talking one minute and then dead the next, happy and smiling one minute and then lifeless the next.  That night I could not sleep at all, the scene was playing in my mind over and over and over again.

Here was a woman full of love, who would never harm a fly, who would give her last dollar to someone in need...... dead. And here I was someone that day filled with malice, crankiness, gluttony yet I was alive and breathing.

J was literally a angel and she touched everyone she came across in a great way, I only had the privilege of knowing J for 4 months, but it was a great honour. I will never forget her smile, her encouraging words, and that her last moments on earth was spent in church surrounded by people she called friends.

I love you J!!